Plan "B"

I'll try to make this a long story short, but I don't think I can. In a nutshell - I get it now. I won't go into the minutia of how I got there, but I ended up on my nephew's porch at around midnight last week. We were talking - not chatting. It made me realize that we chat a lot, but we rarely talk. We were talking about things that really matter; things that are important. Not politics, not work, not petty things of the day. We were talking about relationships and things that make us who we are. It may have helped him, but it certainly helped me a lot.

At 3:00 am, I decided a few things:

You can understand a lot about another person just by paying attention.

Be creative even if you think you suck. And for crying out loud - find an outlet!

Be above the petty. Don't dwell. Resist the urge to overcalculate. I don't know how many ways I can say it.

Selfishness and Arrogance can be my monsters too and can keep me from High Places if I let them.

Saying you're sorry doesn't mean anything if you don't mean it.

Being sorry doesn't mean anything if the other person is unwilling to forgive you.

And the kicker... In the middle of our conversation, Jude said something like, "It's not what you say, it's how they feel about what you say."

You could have knocked me over with a feather. It was a years worth of sensitivity training in a single sentence. Yes, I've heard that before, but for whatever reason, it never had the impact it should have. And, it should have. So, in a nutshell (help, i'm in a nutshell), I think I've grown. Thank Jude.

I had a wonderful, interesting, meaningful time in WP this year. I hope I can do that again. Except next time, I'm going to stay up past midnight on the 4th. And maybe I'll play more beergammon.

Today's photo is of Aileen and Shane at the pool.

P.S. Have you heard about the cruise?

# posted by Johnny @ 7/13/2004 02:12:00 PM