Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Ghost of Christmas Past
I was rummaging through my mail this week when I came across a return address I didn't recognize. "Hmm, Sacramento", I though. "Who do I know in Sacramento?" The envelope was thick - thicker than your average Christmas card. I slit open the top and made sure to preserve the address. I opened the card and began reading. There were various sized and shaped pieces of paper stuffed inside that immediately caught my attention and I stopped reading the card.
I didn't exactly recognize the papers, but I knew I penned them. These were notes and doodles I had done when I was about 18. The card came from an old friend, Lynn, who somehow got my address. I started reading the card... she was wondering how I was doing... her and her husband, Mark, just moved to Sacramento and she was unpacking boxes when she came across these pieces of history.
What a stroll down memory lane! I had memories of my life in Pacifica, but they had grayed and tarnished over the years. They had somehow grown sweet and nostalgic as I suppose memories should. These pages brought everything back to crystal clear.
Suddenly, thoughts and memories I had long stored away came back. Wow! Have I grown since then. Yet in some ways, I haven't grown a day. I'm certainly more mature than I was then. I've become more - um - law abiding. And just now, I've began thinking about my two big nemeses; selfishness and laziness. Have I beat those?
I think the Army cured my laziness more than anything else. There was a time when I was content with a dead end job, living from paycheck to paycheck. I've got more room to grow, but through my eyes, I've come a long way baby.
Now, selfishness. Am I any less selfish now than I was then? In my youth, I wouldn't necessarily care about the feelings of others. I passed it off as, "I don't care what THEY think of ME", but in reality it was more like, "I don't care what I think of THEM." I've certainly become more sensitive to the feelings of others since then, but there again - I've got more room to grow.
Ghosts of Christmas past. They cause you to reflect - and Lord knows I've been in reflection mode a lot lately. It's been good and healthy. Cleansing in a way. It's like being on a ship when the fog cuts back far enough so you can tell where you've been. It's one way of knowing where you're going.
Merry ChristmaChanuQuanzaKa
I didn't exactly recognize the papers, but I knew I penned them. These were notes and doodles I had done when I was about 18. The card came from an old friend, Lynn, who somehow got my address. I started reading the card... she was wondering how I was doing... her and her husband, Mark, just moved to Sacramento and she was unpacking boxes when she came across these pieces of history.
What a stroll down memory lane! I had memories of my life in Pacifica, but they had grayed and tarnished over the years. They had somehow grown sweet and nostalgic as I suppose memories should. These pages brought everything back to crystal clear.
Suddenly, thoughts and memories I had long stored away came back. Wow! Have I grown since then. Yet in some ways, I haven't grown a day. I'm certainly more mature than I was then. I've become more - um - law abiding. And just now, I've began thinking about my two big nemeses; selfishness and laziness. Have I beat those?
I think the Army cured my laziness more than anything else. There was a time when I was content with a dead end job, living from paycheck to paycheck. I've got more room to grow, but through my eyes, I've come a long way baby.
Now, selfishness. Am I any less selfish now than I was then? In my youth, I wouldn't necessarily care about the feelings of others. I passed it off as, "I don't care what THEY think of ME", but in reality it was more like, "I don't care what I think of THEM." I've certainly become more sensitive to the feelings of others since then, but there again - I've got more room to grow.
Ghosts of Christmas past. They cause you to reflect - and Lord knows I've been in reflection mode a lot lately. It's been good and healthy. Cleansing in a way. It's like being on a ship when the fog cuts back far enough so you can tell where you've been. It's one way of knowing where you're going.
Merry ChristmaChanuQuanzaKa
