Monday, April 25, 2005
Heros & Villains
I got my introduction to my new neighborhood this weekend while moving the rest of my junk. I have storage lockers in the garage area, and I decided to go to Home Depot, which is a block away, to get some locks for them. I drove over there, because nobody walks in California, and was in and out in a matter of minutes because of the new self-checkout stands. I'm really starting to like those when they work.
I pulled up and there were squad cars and police and people and spectators and an air of mystery as if I had just walked onto a Hollywood set. "Hmm", I thought, "I don't know what's going on, but I've got work to do with moving." I pulled into my driveway and found that someone had very recently carved "WSM" on my garage door. Well, it was time to visit the nice police officers.
I walked up and found that the police were holding some pretty small children. They weren't in handcuffs, but they were all leaning against the squad car - looking as tough as a 4 foot person could look. "Are these the kids who were tagging doors?", I asked. "No, they were involved in assult and battery", replied the cop - leather bound and looking cool in his mirrored sunglasses.
I couldn't believe my ears. They were in middle school at best; possibly even 5th or 6th grade. I requested that the police visit me after they were done and that it might be a good idea to check the keys of the kids - the one with blue paint on their keys is most likely the one who carved "WSM" on my door.
After an eternity of process that is our modern legal system, the cop took a look at my door. "Ah, West Side Mob" he uttered under his breath. He filled out a police report and said that nothing further would be done. I figured as such, but since he was here and has the suspects in hand anyway, he may as well ding them with another offense (and possibly get their parents to pay for the paint job instead of me - the innocent). At the very least I probably need the police report so the HOA can submit an insurance claim - so all of our rates can go up. Don't you just love "victimless crime"?
I asked if he had any luck looking at the kid's keys. He admitted that he had forgotten to do it, but then later suggested that it was supposed to be done by his partner who had just left to investigate a drive by shooting. For some reason, I happened to remember the license plate of his partner as he drove off(1118088). "Well, whatever", I said giving him a way out.
I decided that all this excitement put me in the mode for some coffee. There's a Starbucks at the end of the block, but I drove anyway. I pulled into the lot and much to my surprise, the drive by shooting must have taken place at the Starbucks on the corner. There were a few squad cars and -yup- good ol' 1118088 was there too. O.K. not the first time I've been lied to.
I got my coffee and went back to Los Gatos to continue my move. In front of the post office, I noticed a young tree was growing sideways into the street, and cars coming off the freeway were whacking it. "This doesn't look right", I thought. I parked my truck and since I had some mail to send off I walked to the post office to get a better look. It appears that someone had pulled up the support poles for about 10 trees. I noticed a woman (Patty) doing some volunteer work in a garden box up the street. I approached her and asked if she had any rope. "I see that there's a tree in need of some love", I shouted over the freeway offramp noise while pointing.
"Yes, I saw that. I wonder how that happened?"
"Well, someone has taken all the poles for the trees in this area."
"Really? Why would the city do that I wonder?"
"Perhaps it wasn't the city." My eyebrows bounced.
Patty looked puzzled at the notion that someone would steal tree poles, but I've heard of cases where people roll up your lawn and steal it. This was within my acceptable range of viable explanations.
"I don't have any rope or string", Patty said, "Otherwise I could have done something."
"I tell you what. I've got some rope at the house. I'm using it to move, but I can spare some to help this tree". I ran back to the house and gathered the rope I had been using to tie my loads down. I returned and Patty and I helped the tree back to a vertical position.
"Does this remind you of Harold and Maude?", I asked jokingly. Patty either hadn't seen the movie of was a little perturbed at being compared to Ruth Gordon.
We got the tree back in shape, high-fived either other, and then Patty wished me a happy Earth Day.
I pulled up and there were squad cars and police and people and spectators and an air of mystery as if I had just walked onto a Hollywood set. "Hmm", I thought, "I don't know what's going on, but I've got work to do with moving." I pulled into my driveway and found that someone had very recently carved "WSM" on my garage door. Well, it was time to visit the nice police officers.
I walked up and found that the police were holding some pretty small children. They weren't in handcuffs, but they were all leaning against the squad car - looking as tough as a 4 foot person could look. "Are these the kids who were tagging doors?", I asked. "No, they were involved in assult and battery", replied the cop - leather bound and looking cool in his mirrored sunglasses.
I couldn't believe my ears. They were in middle school at best; possibly even 5th or 6th grade. I requested that the police visit me after they were done and that it might be a good idea to check the keys of the kids - the one with blue paint on their keys is most likely the one who carved "WSM" on my door.
After an eternity of process that is our modern legal system, the cop took a look at my door. "Ah, West Side Mob" he uttered under his breath. He filled out a police report and said that nothing further would be done. I figured as such, but since he was here and has the suspects in hand anyway, he may as well ding them with another offense (and possibly get their parents to pay for the paint job instead of me - the innocent). At the very least I probably need the police report so the HOA can submit an insurance claim - so all of our rates can go up. Don't you just love "victimless crime"?
I asked if he had any luck looking at the kid's keys. He admitted that he had forgotten to do it, but then later suggested that it was supposed to be done by his partner who had just left to investigate a drive by shooting. For some reason, I happened to remember the license plate of his partner as he drove off(1118088). "Well, whatever", I said giving him a way out.
I decided that all this excitement put me in the mode for some coffee. There's a Starbucks at the end of the block, but I drove anyway. I pulled into the lot and much to my surprise, the drive by shooting must have taken place at the Starbucks on the corner. There were a few squad cars and -yup- good ol' 1118088 was there too. O.K. not the first time I've been lied to.
I got my coffee and went back to Los Gatos to continue my move. In front of the post office, I noticed a young tree was growing sideways into the street, and cars coming off the freeway were whacking it. "This doesn't look right", I thought. I parked my truck and since I had some mail to send off I walked to the post office to get a better look. It appears that someone had pulled up the support poles for about 10 trees. I noticed a woman (Patty) doing some volunteer work in a garden box up the street. I approached her and asked if she had any rope. "I see that there's a tree in need of some love", I shouted over the freeway offramp noise while pointing.
"Yes, I saw that. I wonder how that happened?"
"Well, someone has taken all the poles for the trees in this area."
"Really? Why would the city do that I wonder?"
"Perhaps it wasn't the city." My eyebrows bounced.
Patty looked puzzled at the notion that someone would steal tree poles, but I've heard of cases where people roll up your lawn and steal it. This was within my acceptable range of viable explanations.
"I don't have any rope or string", Patty said, "Otherwise I could have done something."
"I tell you what. I've got some rope at the house. I'm using it to move, but I can spare some to help this tree". I ran back to the house and gathered the rope I had been using to tie my loads down. I returned and Patty and I helped the tree back to a vertical position.
"Does this remind you of Harold and Maude?", I asked jokingly. Patty either hadn't seen the movie of was a little perturbed at being compared to Ruth Gordon.
We got the tree back in shape, high-fived either other, and then Patty wished me a happy Earth Day.
