Plan "B"

I'm jealous of my nephew. He seems to be completely transparent even though one would think he has so much to loose by being so up front about his past. What's past is past though, eh? I guess it's the more case that he has nothing to hide. He can't change what's happened, right? He's changed for the better despite of his past though. His recent post has moved me to not just be honest and not just blog from the heart (i.e. no backspacing allowed), but to expose myself more. But then I think, what if this is just a "shock-blog" thing where people attempt to outdo each other by showing how outrageous their blogs can be.

Then I think, what if I'm still the same person I was when I did all those stupid things? That would make me the same stupid person! Have I learned nothing? What if my attitude is the same? What if just have all these demons and guilt inside and can't let them out? Do we all have demons? A past? Things we regret and can't do anything about? Will bringing them to light do any good? Would I hurt more people than help? How do the people who have successfully beat their demons do it? Questions abound.

I'm sure of one thing though - keeping them in eventually lead me to divorce. Of that I'm sure, even if she isn't. Hmm - call it serendipity, but "Baby, I love your way" just came on. And suddenly, I can't type anymore. Perhaps I'll be brave later.